Dear Bean · family

Constantly amazed by change

Dear Bean,

Some days I find myself sitting with you, and I am totally amazed that I’m a dad. I mean seriously… I’m a dad. I’m your dad. It just blows my mind. You’re this little dude that is sitting on my lap. This little guy who is starting to babble more and more each day. Who gives me smiles on a regular basis when I smile at you, and who is starting to grip things, and interact with the toys that hang above you in your swing, or when you’re laying on your mat on the floor. You are my little guy that is a drool monster. Today you spent about 45 minutes laying on the floor and when I picked you up the back of your sleeper was wet from all of the drool that was pouring continuously out of your mouth. It’s a good thing we have a million pieces of clothing for you.

In the wake of you becoming three months old, I am in constant amazement of you and everything about you.

Love,

Dad

————–

In the wake of Bean turning three months old 10 days ago he hasn’t stopped amazing me. Whether it’s the fact that he is now totally able to hold his head up all of the time, or that he enjoys sitting in his jolly jumper or saucer thing. I have an online album where I post photos of him for his grandparents and friends and family that aren’t in Winnipeg with us (if you’d like the link, let me know in the comments) and this past week I went through them all from the time he was born. It’s amazing to see how much he’s changed. He’s turned from a wrinkled old man baby into a little boy baby.

Time is flying by so quickly now. I remember 3 short months ago, when he was just a couple of days old, sitting in the dark and crying and wondering what I had gotten myself into; wondering if it was possible to give him back. Those first couple of days were such a shock to my system. It didn’t help that he wasn’t feeding properly either and Mrs. Storage had to hand express and we fed him with a spoon for the first couple of days before moving to a syringe. Though there is a part of me that looks at that as a blessing. If feeding had gone smoothly, I wouldn’t have had the same incentive to get up with Mrs. Storage every time she had to feed him, and I would have missed out on both being there for her, and spending that extra time with him. Those were the longest two weeks of my life, and I didn’t think it would ever end. It made me think about all those single moms out that, and I now have the utmost respect for them. Not like I didn’t before, but seriously, having and raising a baby all by yourself? I have no idea how they do it. I don’t think I could do it without Mrs. Storage. She is my rock. She keeps me grounded. I am thankful for her everyday.

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